Owning a Ford truck means you can haul almost whatever you want, tow damn near anything you need, and enjoy a lifestyle sedan owners can never experience.
1. Help Me Move
If you own a truck, your friends will undoubtedly ask you to help them move, this is just the reality of it. We are not bad people, so we will help them move; however, everyone involved has to follow the rules. The help-me-move rule involves three basic things: first, don’t ask me to lift, I am already providing the truck, find another friend to help you carry things, second, pay for my fuel, it is the least you can do for such help, and finally, feed me pizza, you don’t want me just sitting by my truck waiting; a pizza will keep me busy until you finish putting things inside your new place.
2. Fuel is More Expensive
When you have a big, beautiful truck like the Ford F-150, people always expect you to drive, simply because it is roomier than most regular cars. There is only one issue with this arrangement: trucks are not what you would call Hybrids, and the old-school rule of $5 for gas no longer works. So they either start putting some miles on their cars themselves, or start coughing up some real gas money.
3. No, You Can’t Borrow My Truck!
When you own a truck, you need to stay strong and follow this rule for your own sake. People will ask to borrow your truck to do Lord only knows with, but they expect you to just hand them the keys. Unfortunately, this is not Home Depot’s rental truck, and you shouldn’t just give your truck to anyone. You can help them if you find it in your heart, but once you start giving your truck to just anyone unsupervised, it likely won’t be the same again.
4. If it Fits in Yours, Don’t Ask to Use Mine
This is an extremely important rule for when people ask you to move things for them. Most of the time, people will call you for help when they need to move large things, but to minimize the wear and tear on your truck, as well as people taking advantage of you, you have to form a strict rule. Sometimes people will ask you to help them move things that would actually fit in theirs, but since it’s easier just to call you, not to mention they don’t want to hurt their interior, they call poor, ol’ you. The rule is, if it fits in your car, don’t ask to use my truck, even if it has sharp edges.
5. You Can’t Take My Truck Off-Roading
Never, ever lend your truck to someone that wants to take it off-roading. If someone owns a Corolla and they learn that all of their friends are going off-roading, they may just call you to see if you would lend them your truck. Off-roading is the most taxing thing on a truck, and there are thousands of ways it can be done completely wrong. Needless to say, if it’s not you that’s pulling the 4WD lever to 4LO, it shouldn’t be anyone else.
6. Always Have Straps
You will never realize how hard life used to be until you buy a truck, and all of a sudden, life will be tremendously smooth. When you drive your truck, there will be hundreds of opportunities to put things in the back and take it home, but don’t get caught without straps. Whether you see a great couch at Costco or find a sweet motorcycle with a For Sale sign on it, always be prepared to strap them down to drive them home.
7. Never Give a Compliment To a Chevy Truck
This could very well be the most important rule of owning a Ford truck. If you’ve made the right decision of buying the better truck, which is the Ford truck, then you’re part of a community that shares the same animosity toward the rival truck; which is a Chevy truck. The debate has been going on for generations, and regardless of which one is the better truck, you can’t give a compliment to the enemy, ever.
P.S. The Ford is the better truck.